Tuesday, March 3, 2015
Thursday, February 26, 2015
Random journal
New job sorta today. May turn into something bigger. I made a post on California because part of me longs for sunshine and warm weather again. My general feeling at this point is fuck weather, and why do I live in New York anyway, because I have mad love for a lot of people here.
Saturday, December 27, 2014
I am still angry about Boston. I feel cynical about my future: I don't believe that I any doors will open for new jobs with ACCES-VR. I feel like for all these years of hard work in school that I have no future in the field. I hate my old bosses. The anger of losing my job in Boston is fresh and new. I feel like I was cheated, and I want some kind of resolution.
I don't have to look to far out in the world to find things that are unfair or unjust. But, what is so detrimental to me is how hard I have been ruminated on how angry I am. There are plenty of amazing things in my life that I can be grateful for, but this, like one my yoga teachers said, a practice rather than a perfect. I want to call, and see if I could trick Erin into giving me information that I could use against her.
I don't have to look to far out in the world to find things that are unfair or unjust. But, what is so detrimental to me is how hard I have been ruminated on how angry I am. There are plenty of amazing things in my life that I can be grateful for, but this, like one my yoga teachers said, a practice rather than a perfect. I want to call, and see if I could trick Erin into giving me information that I could use against her.
Resolutions
This will be more free association and free writing. I have had good intentions in the past about writing my blogs constantly. However, in practice I don't write very often. One weakness I have is consistency. I can put my whole-heart into something, but the trick has been to keep that momentum going.
I look at writing as an exercise. I am much more motivated to do actually physical exercise then doing writing as an exercise. Like exercise, maybe if I keep doing this I will look forward to this. This could be a great place to keep some record of my thoughts. I think that my brain will change through the process of engaging with this medium.
My hope is that by writing I will be able to focus my thoughts. I will be able to do CBT through journal writing. There is so much to gain. Right now, I feel a block, a lack of confidence in my ability to write anything meaningful, and a general fear of failure.
I have always struggled with grammar. Some people struggle with spelling words, but i struggle with grammar. It was something that was not taught very often when I was in high school, which put me back a lot. I could have done so much more if I had a curriculum that gave me a solid foundation.
Good bit of writing.
Kat
I look at writing as an exercise. I am much more motivated to do actually physical exercise then doing writing as an exercise. Like exercise, maybe if I keep doing this I will look forward to this. This could be a great place to keep some record of my thoughts. I think that my brain will change through the process of engaging with this medium.
My hope is that by writing I will be able to focus my thoughts. I will be able to do CBT through journal writing. There is so much to gain. Right now, I feel a block, a lack of confidence in my ability to write anything meaningful, and a general fear of failure.
I have always struggled with grammar. Some people struggle with spelling words, but i struggle with grammar. It was something that was not taught very often when I was in high school, which put me back a lot. I could have done so much more if I had a curriculum that gave me a solid foundation.
Good bit of writing.
Kat
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